Slippery little suckers......

Oh, I wish I was a little bar of soap, bar of soap
Oh, I wish I was a little bar of soap, bar of soap
I'd go slidey, slidey, slidey over every-body's hidey
Oh, I wish I was a little bar of soap, bar of soap.

I loved that song as a girl scout.  It had a great little rhythm and it was good clean fun....haaaa, get it..clean..WOW!  

I like to talk to my kids.  They are funny, intelligent and nice to be around.  They tell me about their views on life.  How they are feeling and what they dream about.  I let them ramble...on and on.


 I have to admit.  Sometimes I dont care for the topic or what their views are on somethings.  But I listen.  I think sometimes they need to hear their own voices saying somethings out loud.  To really hear what they are thinking.  There is sooooo much more to think about today as a teenager.  

The World is smaller.  Social media brings things into their lives that we never had to deal with.  It is normal and healthy for teens to question.  They need to. 

 It is one thing for us as parents to tell them how it is and it is completely different when they experience it for themselves.  It is insanely hard to not jump in and steer them clear of pain or heartache.  But what would that teach them?  What tools would I be giving them if I always gave them the answers or prevented an outcome?  How will they learn?

This is where the slippery part comes in.  I equate raising teenagers like holding onto a bar of soap.

The harder you squeeze the faster they are going to slip right out of your hands.  Choose your battles.  Keep your heart and your head level...open.  It is too easy to squeeze them......to try and control what they feel ......and it hurts.  It hurts us as parents when our kids turn on ideals and traditions that we as parents have held.  It doesn't feel good to let them find their own way.  Its scary as hell.....

We love our kids so much that holding onto them tightly seems like what we are suppose to do.  That pushing them into the way we do things makes sense because we've already done it.  We know what works.  Its logical.  We don't want to see them make mistakes.   Mistakes.....hummmm?  Perhaps the best way to look at that is as opportunities. Opportunities to teach.  Opportunities to show by example what being a Christian looks like.   Opportunities to see that not everything is done the right way but simply "a" way.   That our kids can teach us too.

There are too many broken hearted teens that dont feel heard.  They dont feel understood, like an alien in their own homes.  The emotions that are running through our kids are valid and real.  When they say they are in love.  ITS LOVE!  When they say I am sad.  LISTEN!  When they cry...HOLD THEM!  Get into their beds and cradle those 160lb 6'2" teens......they need us....now more then ever because soon they will be slipping right out of your hands.

Freedom...

There is a great deal to be said of this last election. 

 But whether your guy won or lost doesn't matter for the purpose of this post. 

 What matters is the process that we took part in.  

The process of choosing. 

 On the days, weeks..leading up to the election we all had the right to choose how to show our support for our values and beliefs.

  Some choose to toss their opponent under the bus...but that too is another post.

  

We had the opportunity to exercise the muscles of democracy. 

 We all had the freedom to think for ourselves and act accordingly.

  

 Simple.....freedom.

But we know that freedom came at a great cost.

We took the family to Washington DC over Thanksgiving weekend.

We walked the National Mall and took in all the sights.

This never gets old to me. 

 I remember going to DC as a child and The Lincoln Memorial steps , though an easier climb still leave me breathless. 
 I hope one day when I am very old they still take my breath away.

My kids are older now and much much wiser.  They know how to connect the dots.

  My William is 13 and the memorials hit him hard.  
He cried openly as he experienced the WWII memorial.

My hubby is fiercely God and Country and he too was overwhelmed by the sacrifices.

It was an extraordinary family trip.  One that left me with the question on freedom....

The fact that many people on our planet do not have freedoms that we take for granted.  

The freedom to think and act as we wish.  The freedom to open our minds and our hearts...

My father in love..(law), but I adore him..so love is more fitting...sent this to me and it was heavenly timing....

“The freedom to be lords of our own tiny skull-sized kingdoms, alone at the center of all creation. This kind of freedom has much to recommend it. But of course there are all different kinds of freedom, and the kind that is most precious you will not hear much talked about in the great outside world of winning and achieving and displaying. The really important kind of freedom involves attention, and awareness, and discipline, and effort, and being able truly to care about other people and to sacrifice for them, over and over, in myriad petty little unsexy ways, every day. That is real freedom. The alternative is unconsciousness, the default-setting, the “rat race” — the constant gnawing sense of having had and lost some infinite thing.” commencement speech by David Foster Wallace given in 2005 (complete read is about 15-minutes – it’s one of the most inspiring things I’ve ever read). In it he said…

Did you get all that????

Holy Cow!!!

At times being a mom..a parent seems like "Groundhog day,". The endless discipline.  The hearing your voice repeat the same stuff over and over.  The tasks that are the same and never ending......this isn't sexy...this is important...this takes great effort...this is self sacrifice...and we choose to do it every single day...without pay...without rest..because we choose to.

I know this is a twist on freedom....

But it makes so much sense to me.


 
God has given each of us the opportunity to choose.  We are innately free to do His will.  To serve others and to care for other people in our own lives in our own homes.

Soul scrubbing.....

It is hard to believe that one minute you can be super super happy and the next ill with disappointment.

The kitchen remodel was going great....
I was so very happy with all the work and the way it was turning out.

But there was this little voice saying that something was just not right.
 Ya see.
 During the demolition the guys found some blue cakes of stuff under the counters.

 Weird....how did it get there?  

What was it?  

Why was it built into my counters?

As the work continued I was on the phone and my mind was in a million places...like usual..( i need to get that looked into..)  And it hit me......blue nasty stuff under counters....rat poison.

I should have thought of that sooner.  It is really a no brainer.  But who does that???

Why would you do that???  Who did it??  Oh man!!

I felt sick.

And then the worst part.  I started looking for blue caky stuff.  Down on my knees pulling drawers completely out and there it was.  Six more.................Oh NO!!!  Not my kitchen!!

When the counters came off the nasty stuff fell behind the drawers up against the wall.  Some of them broke apart and splattered my dishes.

I am a strong girl.  I can and have faced a lot.  But this was over the top.

I grabbed the kids and we hit the store.  We bought lysol, rubber gloves, trash bags, paper towels, masks and some new dishes.

My "bigs" ( big kids) hit it hard......scrubbing scrubbing scrubbing..and SCRUBBING!

I felt good about it.  But there was one more wall of cabinet to check...............

By this time I had called in backup.  My sweet friend Emily.

She said..No biggy lets just check out the other cabinets.

Now we were both armed with gloves and flashlights.  No signs......phew....

Until we looked up...........the blue nasty was squished and running down the inside of the cabinet.

It was 10am and I opened a bottle of wine.

Emily joined me in scrubbing and drinking.

When hubby came home...........I cried.

For some crying is not an event.  But for me...........it is.

I want to move.
My house has not felt like mine since we moved in two years ago.
I have painted, fluffed, replaced, redone...and it still doesnt fit.

Hubby is amazing he said yes.
But we had a vacation coming up.  We decided to use the time to think and pray and regroup.

The scrubbing of the soul..............

This is best done in a sweet little town in Michigan at my cousin's house.
Fresh air, sweet moments with family an plenty of wide open sky. Oh and lots and lots of kittens.

These little ones eyes had not opened yet....The sweetness of the mass of fluff makes me remember that I am not the one in control.  God knows what I need.  He knows where He needs me.  Even when I cant see the plan He has me covered, snuggled down deep in cozy warm grace.

Give the soul a good scrubbing...............God has a plan...

blessings